-Feed with love and respect
-Respond with sensitivity
-Use nurturing touch
-Ensure safe sleep, emotionally and physically
-Provide consistent and loving care
-Practice positive discipline
-Strive for balance in personal and family life.
Now coming to this mind set came pretty easily to me. Damian’s birth was pretty good and it ended up going okay.Ainsley’s was amazing for me. Cael’s was a difficult birth but I prepared for it as best I could. I knew I wanted to breastfeed my son. I wasn’t going to let anything stop me, including his awful latch. I had the milk we just needed to figure it out. It came in time and we had a great nursing relationship till he chose to wean. I continue to have a nursing relationahip with Bobo and lil Squish, and it will continue till they are done or it is no longer mutually desireable.
Safe sleep for us is a combination of co-sleeping and bed sharing. We have an open bed policy for our older children as they are in their own beds now. Damian and Ainsley share a bedroom with each other and up until recently would share a bed. They expressed interest in having their own little beds. They do share a bed when we travel and do well with it. I find it keeps them happier when they are kept together, they seem to have less stress in new situations which is a big thing for Ainsley.
When dealing with our children we try very hard to always be loving and sensitive. they are bundles of emotions and feelings, they need guidance on how to deal with everything going on. Now it is definitely not always easy to be loving and sensitive when dealing with issues, but it is doable. When we falter and are harsh , we will apologize to our children. Apologizing to your child allows them to see that you too make mistakes, and that is okay. It is not a sign of weakness it is a sign of strength.
When it comes to positive discipline this is an on going work for us. I know I don’t want to be the kind of parent that my child feared. I wanted love and understanding in my home. Now getting here is coming along. We reall try to refrain from using physical punishment with the boys. We are not always perfect and we do think that there are times when a swat on the rear has happened. I hate this maybe it’s the way we were raised, I just don’t know what to do sometimes. This is my major failing point.
I look for balance in my life. I seek methods to give balance just sometimes it is so hard to do. Mostly it is my personal life that suffers. I keep putting into my family that I do nothing for me and I breakdown. This is not a good thing. I still need to find balance. but I am working on it.
So honestly I kinda fell into the AP thing I had these ideas and then I found out that there were others like me. I still am different from some AP moms, but I really think different is good. My kids don’t suffer from me learning different ways to care for them. I always am looking to improve my parenting skills. I want my kids to be the most functional people they can be. I want them to think I want them to ask questions. I don’t don’t want them to live in fear. I want them to know they are loved.